much more than marathon training.

i am in training for the may 31 rock & roll marathon in san diego. there is so much about this groundwork that intoxicates my soul. i love the sweat, the pain in my shins, knees, and achilles, and the overall buildup of mileage leading up to race day. the first marathon i ran i did solo, all 26.2 miles and every mile pounded out during the 18 weeks that preceded the race. but this time around i am running with a very dear friend and the dynamic of enduring the discipline and pain of preparation is vastly different. it is far more difficult to skip a day when you know you have someone who is going to ask you about your run - someone who is going to be holding you accountable.

thursdays are our day of rest. it is vital for any athlete in training to have a day where you allow your body to mend itself from the wrenching physical activity you have put it through the other 6 days of the week. today is thursday and i have been blasted with a harsh reality. and the shining enlightenment is this; i am a pathetic rest er. my alarm went off at the break of dawn and the first thought that greeted my mind was that i should go out for a run, even though i know full well that i absolutely need to rest. what makes it so difficult for me to put back the stops that i have so eagerly pulled out? i didn't go for a run, but my mind was still racing with the enticing voices telling me i should.

this difficulty in resting is reflective of much more than cultivating the 26.2 mile garden. in every area of my life it requires complete discipline for me to say no to busyness and choose instead to sit back and breathe deeply. during my intentional times of quietness it faithfully begins with a long and drawn out sparring match. 

it is my heart battling my thoughts. my soul throws out a punch from the book of Mark - thrusting the words "come with me by yourselves and get some rest" directly into the center of my thoughts. but with biting strength my mind fights back - slapping truth with it's tempting advertisements to do more, move faster, and go further. i may be choosing rest physically, but my mind is still spinning. this wrestling match goes of for quite a long while before i am able to hush the noise and draw away into the stillness of the place where love dwells.