Dec 12, 2009

day #4 - tripped by everest and welcoming 28

mother nature has an intrusive way of keeping us in perspective. in an instant she has the ability to destroy the false validations we surround ourselves with. our homes are ripped open by tornadoes, our cars are swept down flooding rivers, and our bodies are buried when we attempt to defy her mountainous forms. we are finite beings in comparison to mother nature. but she can also call us out in softer ways that perfectly parallel to our needs and our way of learning.

today is my 28th birthday. i enjoyed a long outdoor run under the bright winter sky, which presented itself as a blank white canvas for me to liberally smear the culmination of ponderings that began marinating 28 years ago. somewhere, in between blinking and daydreaming, i have lived enough life to be two short years shy off 30.

whenever i go out for a run my imagination runs alongside and within a quarter mile i am transported to a far off land like africa, scotland or italy. instead of jogging on icy sidewalks in the metropolis of the midwest i am covered in the mud that forms when washing the feet of desert travelers. i am strolling through the alley's of europe with my camera and backpack, making friends with the locals as i stop to greet them in their family owned coffee shops. there we spend hours conversing of life's joys and difficulties while slowly sipping a cappuccino.

today however, i was not in one of these romantic countries; i was right here - in minneapolis. running down 53rd ave and catching my grip as i cautiously turned onto bloomington. i didn't even realize what a mess my thoughts had tangled into. somehow a vicious bloody battle was happening and i was on the front lines warring against the enemy's distorted ridicules. their commands catapulted bombs of "should's" and i was dodging past the exploding of noises that blew portraits of what my life should look like as a woman beginning her 28th years of life. in a second i was snapped back into reality as i was barreling face first into the rink of ice below.

a colossal iceberg resembling mount everest fell in the middle of my running path and decided, at random i'm certain, to trip my feet and bask in satisfaction at the sight of my limbs flailing in desperate attempt to save myself from a knee-crushing, teeth shattering biting of the pavement. i've never been a graceful woman. i could never make it as a dancer - i'm far too clumsy. that is why i'm a runner. luckily i have amazing reflexes; it's god's little way of protecting me in the midst of my dangerous inability to do simple things, like walk and chew bubble gum. this brush with humiliation silenced the ammunition of the enemy, stole me from the battle lines of lies and brought me back to the brink of this adventure of my 28th year lying before me.

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